The problem with !!!: Why excessive exclamation marks are like bumping into your ex.
Excessive exclamation marks do not sell.
So why is it that examples of exclamation abuse are rife in the marketing materials of small businesses? They can even sneak in to the blogs and status updates of the most savvy brands.
It mustn’t happen.
Consider the following from a real life website, which I won’t name.
‘Our guest rooms are incredible!!!’
From that, any sane reader would decipher that the claim and the writer’s tone are the only things that are ‘incredible’. And I mean that in the purest sense of the word; literally, not credible.
Because !!! can only be used in exceptional circumstances, like: “Every single one! Including the bonus ball!!!” or “Mr. Kipling is dishing out free cherry bakewells!!!” or “He proposed to me in the pasta aisle!!!”
No one could possibly be that excited about a room in a B&B; owner or otherwise. Even if this were the most stupendous guest room ever encountered, I’d expect my host to have the guile and good grace to explain why using real words rather than an abhorrent overuse of punctuation. That doesn’t tell me anything.
So it would seem that my B&B owner is either a) lying; or b) uncontrollably excited about something he really shouldn’t be. Like a child might be. And I don’t want a child in charge of frying my eggs in the morning, thank you very much. Now where’s the next B&B in this town?
To put it another way, the excessive use of exclamation marks is the literary equivalent of bumping into your ex. Think about it. !!! is the fake facade of hyper-excitement and good will you generate to try and appear cool and natural when you see your recent paramour in the pub. It’s an uncomfortable gloss that suggests you have something to hide. Unfortunately, that gloss is completely transparent; in person and in copy. Your customers will see straight through it and it will really shake their confidence in your brand.
Sure, you could argue that !!! gets attention. But so does the lunatic who shouts and gesticulates wildly in the street. That doesn’t mean I’m going to buy anything off him. Catch my drift?
Now, the occasional exclamation mark is perfectly acceptable. Especially if a playful and light-hearted tone is the order of the day. But it must be used wisely. Make sure your sentence really warrants it. And you must only ever use one at a time. There are no exceptions. Unless you want copy that smacks of desperation/insanity/a crippling lack of self-confidence.
So for a cool, calm, controlled tone, remember to steer clear of !!!.
